I'm a statistical anomaly. 2 accidents, both times I got rear-ended, in two days, on Cleveland Avenue driving home from work.
The first accident was when I was approaching the stop light near the McDonald's in New Berlin. I was almost to a complete stop when I heard the squealing brakes behind me. I looked in the rearview mirror to see a car slamming on it's brakes fishtailing for about 15 feet before he slammed into me. After making sure my son was unhurt, I got out of the car to confront the driver and inspect the damage. A kid walked up to me (a total slacker) and stuck his hand out as if to shake mine and said, "Sorry about that dude. The sun got in my eyes."
Not gee, I'm sorry, is everything okay, here's my insurance, is there anyone else in your car...
So I chewed him out for five minutes. I did not shake his hand as that is activity that conveys respect and a measure of equality. That and I wouldda tossed him into the street.
We walked to the back of my car and inspected it for damage. So far, so good. I told him he hit me hard enough that it's probably knocked out of alignment, but I would have it checked out before I spoke to his insurance agent. Blank stare. Drool. Asked him for his insurance. He gave me his medical card. No, I want your auto insurance. Goes back to his car. "I think this is it. This is my mom's insurance. Her name is different..."
You know that scene in The Godfather where Sollozzo's talking to Michael and all Michael hears is the train before he pulls the gun and kills Sollozzo?
Back to reality. I ask, so what's your name again and what's your phone number? Well, it looks like you're lucky and there isn't any damage and my kid is unhurt so I'm going to get my car inspected and we'll see what the mechanic says before I call your insurance agent. I look at the insurance info and it's some company I never heard of. Greeaaaaat.
At this point you're wondering where the New Berlin Police Department is. So am I. But three more near accidents occur while I'm standing there so I say adios to the slacker and drive straight home.
The next day I leave work early because I have to make it to my mechanic before 5pm. Same street, stopped one stoplight away from the previous accident, and some stupid girl with a car full of giggling teenagers rearends my car again! This time I wasn't hit nearly as hard, and when giggling teenage girl (with enough hardware in her face to be a collection of refrigerator magnets) gets out of her car she and I look for damage, again not seeing any. I get a quick giggling "I'm sorry" before she gets back in her car. I am in such a rush trying to get to my mechanic I don't even bother with it and take off. So fish hook head is yet one more reminder why teenage girls are just as dangerous, if not more so, than young boys.
After final inspection, the Plymouth Neon came through with, uh, flying colors. Except I needed new tires. Except for some other things completely unrelated to the accident. $400 later and an estimate for some work I need done "in the near future." shit.
