Minnesota senate contest end in sight

A three-judge panel in Minnesota just awarded the US Senate election to former comedian Al Franken, according to the Associated Press.

A Minnesota court confirmed Monday that Democrat Al Franken won the most votes in his 2008 Senate race against Republican Norm Coleman, who had already announced plans to appeal the decision.

Coleman has 10 days to appeal to the state Supreme Court. Once the petition is filed, it could further delay the seating of Minnesota's second senator for weeks.

After a statewide recount and seven-week trial, Franken stands 312 votes ahead. He gained more votes from the election challenge than Coleman, the candidate who brought the legal action.

The state law under which Coleman sued required three judges to determine who got the most votes and is therefore entitled to an election certificate, which is now on hold pending an appeal.

"The overwhelming weight of the evidence indicates that the November 4, 2008, election was conducted fairly, impartially and accurately," the judges wrote. "There is no evidence of a systematic problem of disenfranchisement in the state's election system, including in its absentee-balloting procedures."

I know some Republicans will never accept the outcome, but they should. As Scott Johnson of the Powerline Blog has pointed out (most recently in National Review) Franken may not be a funny choice for the senate, but he did not steal the election.

Coleman has already announced his intention to fight the ruling at the state supreme court, as is his right, but he is unlikely to prevail. Pursuing this at the federal level, or even in the senate would take extraordinary justification that so far the Republicans have not shown.

Time to prepare for the end and learn the lessons of how not to fight a recount.

NY Times discovers "Fat" is insulting

The New York Times is reporting talk-show host Laura Ingraham was unhappy with Megan McCain's criticisms of author Ann Coulter and retaliated in less-than-kind, "That enraged Ms. Ingraham, who responded on her radio show by mimicking Ms. McCain, using a caustic “Valley girl” voice. (The blog ThinkProgress has the audio.)"

Ingraham was quoted saying while imitating McCain:

O.K., I was really hoping that I was going to get that role in “The Real World,” but then I realized that, well, they don’t like plus-sized models.

I'm not a fan of Ms. Ingraham's so I do not know if attacking someone's weight is a normal part of her schtick.

However, whatever weight issues Ms. McCain may have, such a personal attack is clearly unwarranted. If you want to attack her youth, inexperience, lack of political acumen, political philosophy, then have at it. But attacking McCain’s body type to score political points and entertain an audience is no more appropriate than making cancer jokes about Ingraham. Ingraham should apologize.

That said, I am pleased to discover the New York Times is now aware of issue of attacking one’s weight in political discourse today. I cannot wait for the newspaper to follow up on all the attacks on other political pundits for their waist size rather than ideas.

They can start, of course, with an editorial attacking the critics of Rush Limbaugh for resorting to fat jokes early and often when criticizing him. One of the first times my wife and I listened to Rush Limbaugh together El Rushbo was reading an e-mail sent to him by a liberal, “I. Hope. You. Die. Of. Cancer. You. Fat. Ass.”

Minnesota is about to send former comedian Al Franken to the US Senate, so this might be a good time for the New York Times to ask what he thinks of fat Minnesotans. After all, he thought weight was a significant enough issue when he wrote Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Idiot. Judging from the title and the tone of the book (I won’t judge it just by its cover) it’s pretty plain that Franken considers “Big” and “Fat” as pejoratives. I wonder if many “big” and “fat” Minnesotans were aware of the little esteem Franken holds for them.

You would think that I, the sexiest man in the Cheddarsphere, would be immune from such personal attacks. No so, my cheeseburger-deprived friends. Despite not having a national radio talk show or residence in Minnesota (although I have eaten there) I, too, have been the recipient of a few shots aimed at my weight. What I find shocking is the number of them that cannot even make the insult sound original, and their criticisms do not go much further than the initial insult. There are no small bloggers, only commenters small in mind.

Franken tells another bad joke

Minnesota comedian and candidate for senate Al Franken is requesting the court allow him to be given a temporary certification as senator while the courts consider a challenge to the election results by Senator Norm Coleman. Coleman and Franken competed in last November’s election, only to have results so close that a recount was needed. Coleman had won the initial vote tally but Franken appears to have won the recount. However, the courts are examining the recount results and, per Minnesota law, no certification has taken place.

Now Franken is arguing that he should be given the senate seat temporarily because Minnesota needs two representatives in the senate to vote on the stimulus package and other important questions.

The argument is, of course, absurd. Without a clear understanding of the preferences of Minnesotans, it is impossible to pick one person or the other to cast votes in the senate. Franken’s argument is “someone’s gotta do it” but there is no case that it should be specifically him. One could easily argue that the temporary senator should be the incumbent, or even a third party (Jesse Ventura?) until the court case is resolved if Franken’s arguments had any merit.

It’s likely, but not certain, that Franken will prevail. One could even argue that the recount going awry was Norm Coleman’s fault. It does not appear to be the result of Franken’s campaign trying to steal the election.

However, until the voters’ intentions can be discerned through the careful examination by the Minnesota courts of the recount Minnesota should be content with one senator. If they cannot live with one senator, then the only person under Minnesota law that could fill the vacancy by appointment is Governor Tim Pawlenty.

Biodiesel days

Students in Minnesota were the beneficiaries of trying to put Mother Nature in the fuel tank. No school today.

All schools in the Bloomington School District will be closed today after state-required biodiesel fuel clogged in school buses Thursday morning and left dozens of students stranded in frigid weather, the district said late Thursday.

Rick Kaufman, the district's spokesman, said elements in the biodiesel fuel that turn into a gel-like substance at temperatures below 10 degrees clogged about a dozen district buses Thursday morning. Some buses weren't able to operate at all and others experienced problems while picking up students, he said.

"We had students at bus stops longer than we think is acceptable, and that's too dangerous in these types of temperatures," Kaufman said.

Sarah Janecek has a little background on the biofuel folly:

And put this in the category of "you just can't make it up": The only "science" behind the entire biodiesel mandate debate was one Hennepin County study of about a dozen vehicles. The study was conducted in July. [Those of us lobbying on behalf of railroads quietly got railroads amended out of the mandate when we obtained a letter from railroad engine manufacturers saying that all warranties on those engines were void if biodiesel was in the fuel mix.]

Holy Garrison Keillor, Batman!

Minnesota is now even between Barack Obama and John McCain.

Minnesota has become a battleground in a presidential campaign that has dramatically tightened nationwide.

A new Star Tribune Minnesota Poll shows that the race is now a dead heat between Barack Obama and John McCain, each supported by 45 percent of likely voters in the state.

The new poll likely will stoke both sides' efforts during the final 51 days until the election, triggering a barrage of advertising, grass-roots politicking and, potentially, stepped-up visits by the candidates.

The poll found that McCain has made gains across the board since a May Minnesota Poll that showed him trailing by 13 points. He has picked up considerable support among men and to a lesser degree among women. He also has boosted his standing with whites, young voters and all levels of household income and education.

A quick back of the envelope calculation tells me that if Ohio continues it's trends, Michigan remains competitive, and Minnesota falls...

Well, let's put it this way. McCain wins Ohio (likely) and Minnesota (possible) he can afford to lose New Mexico and Colorado and still end up with 275. If he wins New Hampshire, so much the better. Oh yeah, McCain's doing better in Washington (- 2), too, probably thanks to Dino Rossi and Sarah Palin.

Cheesehead refugees

I had hoped to be in Minneapolis/St Paul myself next week, but a sequence of events this summer conspired against me. It's a conspiracy, I tell ya! Unfortunately family and work priorities had to come first.

As someone who has been to a Republican National Convention (New Orleans '88), I can tell you they are a blast. Just to show I'm not bitter or jealous of those local bloggers that are going, let me assure their spouses that I'm sure there won't be nearly as many hookers in St. Paul as there were in New Orleans.

Anyway, it looks like Owen Robinson, Lance Burri, Christian Schneider and Sean Hackbarth are going. (Looking at the list, I'm hoping we'll all be spared the live-blogging from the front row of Garrison Keillor's Prairie Home Companion.)

I want the Paris Hilton video on entitlements

Time for another edition of the Idiot Politician of the Week. You know the idiots are running wild in politics when Paris Hilton proposes an energy plan. We’re told that her little spoof ad has had over 3,000,000 visitors. So has Paris. But the question is, which has had more views on the internet, her energy proposal or her sex video?

Speaking of the Over-exposed, the polls are a bad omen lately for the O-man. People are tired of hearing about Senator Barack Obama as he runs for scold-in-chief. His mother always told him, wear clean underwear and check your tires. He’ll hear about yet another nomination for Idiot Politician of the Week as he visits his grandmother in Hawaii. It’s the least he can do since he called her a bigot.

The nominations are working at correcting bad boy behavior among the politicians. Just this week former Senator John Edwards admitted to having an affair, but the kid is not his son, Billie Jean. Ma Ma, Where’s my Pa? So, um, Senator, just what were you doing in that hotel room? Enquiring minds still want to know.
Except for maybe Bob Woodruff, who asked the most fawning of questions,

Your wife, Elizabeth, is probably the most admired and beloved person in this country, she's had enormous sympathy because she's also gone through cancer, how could you have done this?

For a second I thought John Edwards was married to Oprah.

I’m still waiting for the aggrieved political wife who forgets her social-climbing ambitions and says, “Yeah, he’s a cheating bastard and I’m divorcing him. Only because the restraining order prevents me from killing him.”

But as sexy as the Edwards scandal is, I bet we can find someone even dumber. The trick is, you have to know where to look. If you’re looking for the IQ low point, a good place to start is Detroit. Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick, just realeased from jail, is looking at two more felony counts after he allegedly shoved a police officer serving a subpoena at his sister’s house. To be fair to Detroit, elected officials in Milwaukee that get into altercations with the cops get hugged by suburban mayors before eventually going to jail on something completely different.

Mayor Kilpatrick spent the night in jail after not telling anyone he was leaving the country temporarily – to Windsor, ON. Probably never occurred to him why they use different currency over there. Kilpatrick once said he believed the job of mayor was an assignment from God. Too bad he doesn’t listen to God on other matters, like Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery And Send Text Messages About It And Other Prosecutable Offenses. Or, Thou Shalt Not Bear False Witness, one of my favorites.

Kilpatrick is facing a recall effort, removal by the city council, calls from the public to resign, religious leaders asking him to resign, felony prosecution on 12 points, and even a request to the governor to just remove him from office. Kilpatrick says its a conspiracy.

Meanwhile somebody who claims to be an expert on idiots recently had an idiotic episode of his own. Looking for the idiot politician of the week? Then send in the Fool. But somebody forgot to get an audience first, and the rapidly more foolish looking Al Franken and his senate campaign is looking a little more hopeless. His campaign scheduled an event to discuss veterans’ benefits and only one person (other than the press) showed up. Perhaps everyone was afraid Franken was going to do his stand-up routine. Then he lied about his opponent’s record and admitted he had no idea if his own plan would work or how much it would cost. When I’m looking for a Big Fat Idiot, I’m looking at you Al Franken.

But let’s jump back across the border to Wisconsin where Congressman Steve Kagen was asked by the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel what he would do about out-of-control federal entitlement spending.

The Journal Sentinel Editorial Board asked members of Wisconsin's congressional delegation to write brief essays explaining what needs to be done about the coming fiscal problems posed by entitlement spending - and what they are prepared to do to lead in this effort.

Kagen responded that he would expand federal involvement in health-care and drill for oil.

Everywhere in Wisconsin, people are asking for help to reduce prices for gasoline and health care, and rural areas, which make up much of the 8th District that I have the honor of representing, are affected most. I'm working hard on solutions to these challenges, which are more inter-related than many might first guess.

Now why didn’t Al Gore think of that instead of proposing his lock box in 2000? Has someone told Congressman Paul Ryan we don’t have to worry about Medicare and Social Security? Congressman Kagen is going to make sure every oilman is covered under universal health care.

Yep, there is someone dumber than Ted Thompson in Green Bay. As Brian Reidl in the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel put it,

Rep. Steve Kagen (D-Appleton) gave the most bizarre response of all. Asked how to solve Social Security and Medicare’s deficits, he ignored the question and instead recited unrelated talking points on energy independence, oil drilling and health care accessibility. Kagen’s response failed to display even an elementary understanding of Social Security and Medicare reform. Grade: F

I thought the DNCC sent babysitters out to Kagen’s district to prevent gaffes like this? Is he such an idiot that even they can’t keep track of everything he’s doing? If that’s the case, congratulations Congressman Kagen. You are our Idiot Politician of the Week.

Can he walk and practice law at the same time?

The Associated Press infamously asked, what comes after Senator Kennedy? Apparently Massachusetts State Senator James Marzilli is looking to become an honorary Kennedy.

Marzilli, 50, pleaded not guilty Wednesday to six charges that he tried to grope one woman and harass another in Lowell Tuesday. He was released on $1,500 bail and is due back in court next month for a pretrial hearing.

Just last month, Middlesex District Attorney Gerard T. Leone Jr. said there was not enough evidence to charge Marzilli with inappropriately touching a woman he drove home from a fund-raiser in Arlington in April.

Leone said authorities are investigating allegations against the senator of inappropriate sexual contact with a woman in Brighton two years ago and in Arlington last year. Lowell police said that they are investigating reports from three other women who said Marzilli accosted them in Lowell Tuesday.

This is the second time the senator has been accused. But can we safely call Marzilli an idiot for hiring a lawyer named Kennedy for this type of case?

How about a collection of idiots in nearby New York? How about the whole United Nations General Assembly who managed to find an actual Commie to lead them?

The General Assembly of the United Nations voted this week to elect Miguel d'Escoto Brockmann as its new president. Readers with a long memory will recall Father D'Escoto (he's a Catholic priest) as Nicaragua's foreign minister during the Sandinista regime of the 1980s. He's also the winner of the 1985 Lenin Prize. Only at the U.N. does that count as a recommendation.

The U.N. also voted to name the government of Burma – which otherwise has been busy preventing humanitarian assistance from reaching hundreds of thousands of its own needy victims of last month's devastating cyclone – as one of the Assembly's vice presidents. Only at the U.N. is this not considered an embarrassment.

"Father" d'Escoto is already in full United Nations mode:

He also called for the U.N. to take a stand against "acts of aggression, such as those occurring in Iraq and Afghanistan." That would be American aggression, not the Taliban's, the Mahdi Army's or al Qaeda's.

Oh Heck, why not make a Commie head of the UN? Doesn't it confirm what most of us thought of the organization? Too bad Kurt Waldheim's dead. They could dig him up and go for the offensive totalitarian and fulfill the UN's mission of hating Israel at the same time.

Not too far away from here a similar-sized body, the Democratic-Farmer-Labor Party of Minnesota, found former comedian* Al Franken suitable to be a US Senator. He may have questionable finances. He may be offensive. But gosh darn it, the Democrats like him. In the end, not a dissenting voice was heard.

One voice we wish would just go away to Plains, GA, is former President Jimmy Carter. During an interview with the Guardian:

I ask whether he detects an in-the-gut conversion to the path of peace in the Hamas leaders he met: "I do, but I may be naive and I may be mistaken."

That should be his epitaph.

But we're looking for a prize winner, and we find the prize idiot a little closer to our village. State Senator Jim Sullivan (Duh-Wauwatosa) actually picked a fight with a high school girl (15:35 in) about her school project and she out-debated him on vote fraud. While he's harrassing high school students and lying to them about his record, he's forgetting to mail in the paperwork to keep his law license in good standing. (ht: Badger Blogger) His clients may be wondering if their right to competent council has been compromised, and Jim Sullivan earns our idiot politician of the week award. As soon as he sends in the proper paperwork, we'll send him his prize.

* former, because he hasn't been funny for years.

No wonder he fit in so well at Air America

Comedian Al Franken, who was once funny, is showing that he may not be good enough, and people might not like him. His race for US Senate in Minnesota has not been too smooth, and now his business practices are coming into question. As Sean Hackbarth notes,

The Franken campaign failed to do the most basic of research: vet their candidate. These tax problems could have been handled months ago. Instead, the Minnesota GOP has turn them into potent political bullets.

That's the problem with celebrity candidacies. The staff spends more time asking the candidate for autographs then they do asking him, "Oh, by the way, any skeletons in your closet?" Unfortunately for them, the RNSC probably has some staffers that have never thought Saturday Night Live was funny.

I started a joke

I remember when Al Franken was a comedian. Unfortunately, that hasn't been for some time, and raising gas taxes isn't funny.

In the belly of the beast

Nearly spur of the moment, actually planned for some time, the Wigderson clan is breaking in a new hotel in Minneapolis/St Paul/Bloomington just days before the Minnesota Caucus. Forget the Super Bowl, we're here for the Mall of America and a preview of Super Tuesday.

My goal is to get up for the continental breakfast and the morning newspaper before the rest of the family. I'll let you know if I see Bill Clinton. I hear some girls giggling down the hall...